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4 Criteria for Effective Discipline: Belonging and Significance

Updated: Jan 17, 2022

by Hannah Slattery, LPC, NCC


Criteria number 2 for Positive Discipline is all about connection. Feeling connected and a part of society is an instinctual need. Being a part of a family and understanding one's role and significance is crucial for healthy development. As parents I would like you to start thinking about when you feel the most secure and connected to one another in your family. What are you doing together, how are you treating one another and most importantly how do you think everyone is feeling during these interactions. Let’s now think about when you were at your wits end because everyone was flustered, frustrated and freaking out. How connected and significant did you feel then?


One tool that is highly effective to help build connection within the Positive Discipline teachings are Family Meetings. Family Meetings are essential so that every single family member plays a role in contributing to the household in an effective and loving way. Remember back to the 411 on Positive Discipline article (if not, please go back and read the basics), we spoke about the challenges and life skills chart. Family Meetings encourage life skills building while working on the challenges together.


There are two ways Family Meetings can be run. The first is the “Short Version”, designed so that if there is an acute family issue, sibling rivalry, struggling with homework or chores, the one topic can be sorted through together.


Short Version guidelines

  1. All family members must be present(make time for this)